I’m a 25 year old Lieutenant in the Air Force. I fly F-15s here at Nellis AFB in Las Vegas. My wife (she’s 24) & I have been married a little under a year, & its been an ok marriage. We both met in college at UC Boulder while I was in AFROTC, & she was a student employee for the department. I admit, yeah, I used to be a really big party animal & I dated & slept with a lot of women in college, & my wife constantly won’t let me forget that, but I mean I’ve tried to change since then. I’ve never understood why she just can’t let the past be the past.
Anyway, the other evening when I got home from the base, we both got into a really huge argument because she confronted me of & accused me of cheating after I got back from a TDY assignment to Luke AFB in Arizona. She found a receipt from a restaurant in Phoenix for lunch for two that I had meant to put in the shredder, but forgot, in the pocket of one of my flightsuits when she was doing laundry, as well as the fact that she found lipstick on the collar of my flightsuit. I told her all I did was take one of the civilian secretaries from my squadron who went with me & a couple of other guys in the squadron on the TDY to lunch, nothing more. There was nothing sexual about it or anything. I never even slept with her or touched her, it was just a friendly lunch, nothing more. The lipstick was just from a quick 2 second friendly kiss as thanks for the lunch. My wife went overboard on me, she started throwing my clothes out into the parking lot of our apartment complex, then she went & smashed one of my favorite bottles of cologne that she bought me last Christmas. She told me that our marriage was over, & that I’m just a womanizing b@st@rd. I also called her a few names & said she should be sticking by her hubby, to which she told me to go to Hell.
Anyway, I decided to go cool off for a few hours while she just locked herself in the bedroom crying over nothing in my opinion. I drove around for a while, & then remembered a couple of my buddies in my squadron told me about this strip club just off the Strip. I decided to check it out to make me feel a little better. I went in & then I bought a couple of lap dances. I had a lot of alcohol as well there, so I was pretty drunk.
During one of the lap dances in a private room, I ended up getting a bon*r. I had these Levi jeans on & the pressure of it pushing on them was just too much to handle & I ended up blowing my load. My boxers were soaked. I was thinking about staying a little longer, but I was feeling a little sick from all the alcohol I drank. I was going to drive back home, but then I realized I was too drunk to drive & couldn’t even walk straight, so I just got a cab home & left my Jeep at the club.
I got home & my wife was waiting up for me, saying she was worried about me & wanted to talk to me, but I just told her I was too tired to argue & just wanted to get undressed & go to sleep. She seemed pretty upset, & as I was getting into bed, she noticed my boxers & the c*m stains on the front of them. She accused me of going to see the woman from work I took out to lunch. I told her straight out that I did not go see her. I don’t even know where she lives. I told her I went to a strip club instead, & she pretty much started slapping me & pounding into me, saying I was a cheating b****rd, & that going to a strip club was even worse in her eyes. She also said if I remember correctly that she is going to go to my CO (which could ruin my military career if she tells him she thinks I’m cheating) & made me sleep on our couch. Anyway, the next morning she left me a note saying she is going to stay with her mom back home in Denver, where we are both from, & that she wants nothing to do with me, & said I’m no different than when we were in college. I tried calling her, but her Mom answers every time & refuses to put me onto her, saying that I’m no longer her son-in-law as far as she’s concerned & that I don’t care about anyone but myself, & I’m a poor excuse for an Air Force Officer & called me a typical fly-boy. Her mom’s always hated my guts anyway. She’s saying I need to get on the next flight back to Denver and go groveling on my hands and knees to my wife to beg for her forgiveness. How am I supposed to explain that kind of leave request to my command? Plus I have other obligations here in Las Vegas to attend to. I have a feeling my wife might divorce me over this. I really don’t want to go through a messy & expensive divorce, I don’t have the time for that & I do love my wife.
I mean I’m really getting worried she’s going to speak to my CO about this. I just wish she would believe me that I’m not a womanizer. Am I really a bad person because of this, & a poor excuse for a USAF Officer like her Mom said? I really don’t want to ruin any chances of being promoted to Captain over this.